1) The Three Stressors: categorize for clarity and forward action.
2) Face your fear: speak it out loud, then re-frame it as a Hero's Journey. What would breakthrough on the journey look like? What is the vision you see ahead? What will it take to Leap?
Try using these two tools and following your live-with, JUST DO IT!, this week in order to take action on your course challenge. How can you get enough clarity, so that you can take appropriate action on your challenge and any other challenges you might be facing?
Again, as Hal stated last week, go for progress, not perfection. Remember:
Stressor 1: gained 8 lbs in the last 4 months! (ACTION)
ReplyDeleteAction plan:
1) Eat nutritionally balanced, well-PORTIONED meals.
2) Eat breakfast.
3) Be mindful when eating.
4) Account for what I eat (everything!) -- write it down.
5) Weigh and measure at least weekly (write it down).
6) Exercise for at least 30 minutes 5-6 times per week. Emphasize cardio. Write it down in log!
7) Reward myself weekly when weekly goals are met.
8) Get enough sleep.
Stressor 2: not sure which direction to go professionally (CLARITY -- what's important for me? what do I LOVE? then just do it already! Out of perpetual incubation!)
Stressor 3: Others have strong opinions about what it is that I "should" be prioritizing (ATTITUDE: they will have their say --> ACTION: listen for what's true, then choose for myself based on EEE).
That's a great action plan Mai! Good luck!! :)
ReplyDeleteThis is turnign out to be another productive "Live-with"
Here's what I've noticed: As i go through my "one task per day" list, Im covering more ground than expected. Like when you unclog the main pipe, the entire plumbing system becomes more efficient!
Thanks Suhasini! I went running this morning. Weighed myself this am. Eating sensibly this morning.
ReplyDeleteI am also conquering my fear of admitting that I need to lose weight by talking openly about it with others (so they can support me in my new eating/exercising/healthy living plan).
I passed on leftover birthday cake brought in by one of my staff.
Hi folks! I got a pass for a free class of the Bar Method (new exercise method I found) and just did it this morning. Intense, but should be good to mix it in with other forms of activity (variety is the spice of life).
ReplyDeleteMai,
ReplyDeleteI love how you are keeping us all up-to-date on your clear intentions. You have certainly taken the notion of claiming allies to help you in your challenge. It's an honor to be witness to your creative process.
Julie
Hello everyone,
ReplyDeleteThis 'Live with' has done wonders for me. :) 'Just do'-ing it without thinking too much about it saved a LOT of my time. I have much more energy and better mental focus. Thank you so much Julie and Hal, for providing me with these wonderful tools.
I could not follow a proper meditation routine but Every time I started worrying about something...I would stop doing whatever I was doing, sit comfortably and try noticing my breathings with my eyes closed...and repeat this exercise until I am calmed down. IT REALLY WORKED. I feel so relaxed.
Now I would also like to share an amazingly feel-good experience with you. Day before yesterday I went to the top of the Hoover tower with my son. What a magnificent view…I enjoyed the vastness of the sky, I could see far and wide.
Then I looked down and saw the people moving about…they looked sooo tiny. I felt so humble. My worries, problems seemed so small and trivial. Rather I felt thankful for the positive things in my life. It was a very nice feeling
This week’s Live-With has a lot of components, and I think that I will need to experiment with all of them in future when the opportunity seems right. For this particular exercise I decided to go back to the Hero’s Journey concept and place two of my major life challenges in that journey perspective. First of all, I’ve realized that defining both of my life challenges either as a fear or as a goal would be easy, but choosing a definition that implies a goal inspires hope, while a definition of the life challenge as a fear sounds somehow more like a self-fulfilling prophesy.
ReplyDeleteSo, for both life challenges I defined preparation/calling stage, vision, frustrations I have around reaching my goals, and what strategies I’m already applying to find solutions. In doing that a few things came to my mind: I tend to define goals in big terms with big visions; that approach may be good, but sometimes too far away or abstract and defining sub-goals or sub-challenges may be useful. Also, I’ve came to conclusion that my loops are going among frustration – incubation – strategizing. I may occasionally even need to go back and redefine a challenge to be sure that I’m addressing the right thing and defining my challenge correctly. Third, it was good for me to list my existing strategies and see how and where I can consciously apply, and try out the new ones that we are learning in the class.
Here is the link to the Steve Jobs Commencement Address at Stanford (2005) that we have mentioned a few times:
ReplyDeletehttp://news-service.stanford.edu/news/2005/june15/jobs-061505.html
Pretty good reading,
Hal
Thanks Hal, beautiful reading.. Best part: Stay Hungry, Stay foolish!
ReplyDeleteThis "Live-With" is the most productive and helpful one thus far. My biggest stressor is basically myself! I keep reminding myself how I have so much to do, but so little time. Thinking about all the things that need to be done not just for the day but the week and sometimes month is very stressful!
ReplyDeleteSo I started making 3 lists (I love lists!):
1) Things that have to be done today (with clear schedule of when I'll be doing them during the day);
2) Things that have to be done tomorrow (not as urgent as the ones that need to be done today); and
3) Things that can be done when it's done (not meaning to procrastinate, but those that don't require so much attention).
In my daily schedule, I've put some extra time to relax and have a break vs. working all the time. I noticed that the past month or two, I haven't gone out to lunch... I kept eating at my desk and it was taking a toll on me. So now I've scheduled lunches with my co-workers a few times a week to force me (and them!) to take a break during the day.
By having a clear goal and deadline, I'm not so worried about time as much (although I sometimes freak out at how much stuff that needs to be done). And by scheduling "me" time, I can relax a bit too!
The best part about categorizing the stressors has been the "attitude" stressors. I come into work all stressed because I have to deal with traffic in the morning. But now, I try to look at it differently - I sing along with the radio, I talk to my friends in the car (using my bluetooth headset, of course!) and try to spend the time that way vs. stressing. Changing the perspective that way has made my 30-mile commute (each way) more pleasant.
I love the Commencement speech given by Steve Jobs as well.
ReplyDelete-------------------
Its kinda ironic that this week, our "management" at work decided they want to track every thing that is outstanding from our project (our project is highly visible).
They "ordered" us to make every single remaining feature bug Highest Priority, and status HOT (must be done immediately). Essentially every task now has the identical priority, so they can track them. (our bug database is not very good)
They don't care what is more important, and what is less important, even after my manager explained to them, that does no one any good.
They just want to track them.
If this had happened before this semester, I probably would have been furious.
Having gone through with this week's live-with, my reaction was a lot calmer because of multiple reasons.
1. I have a very clear goal of what is important and urgent, and what is important and less urgent, regardless of what management thinks. So this strange "order" doesn't really affect my priority.
2. I am thankful that they are just asking to flatten the priority of all our work tasks, and have not stepped in and trying to boss around who should be doing what next.
3. Knowing how ridiculous it is, I can just laugh it off, and move on with my job, rather getting emotional/upset about it.
I choose to act on a great idea: I signed up for the Santa Cruz Half Marathon (13.1 miles!) -- April 11, 2010. I have been running at least 3 times a week and then cross training 2-3 other days. One day intentional "active" rest. My best friend from high school is also running the half with me. This will be my second half marathon (the first was over 10 years ago!).
ReplyDeleteI did it! I always wanted to go out for fishing in the small speed boat in the middle of the ocean. My biggest fear was not knowing swimming. And, what? "Just do it" made me go for it :) I had a wonderful experience. After 3 hours I was brought back unconscious due to sea sickness but to hell, I had a great gala time in toto.
ReplyDeleteNext, mountain climbing :) and Entrepreneurship
Since a year my father is pushing me to write a manual about how to manage a medium size luxury boutique. Aside from the fact that I don’t consider myself as a good writer - 60% VOJ 40% self-awareness :-) - this project always appealed to me. Even if the context has been in front of me everyday, I always managed to find rational excuses.
ReplyDeleteJust do it !?! It sounds so simple, but this live-with was for me as hard as learning to have no expectations....
On a daily basis, I normally JUST DO things. So after the class, it took me a little while to find a new task. Until one morning, I woke up and it seemed very clear that my new project was writing a manual about my job. My morning “illumination” seemed exactly as described by my father: easy, fun and very instructive.
That day , I worked a lot knowing that this strong motivation and creative boost wouldn't last…
My project is still running and it is going well! Not sure about the outcome yet, but I am really happy. I managed to overcome my fears. It is a wonderful live-with after all ;-)